Broad of the Year…For Sure…
I mean, she might have been executed for this…
Mar
17
Mar
3
Topeka, Kansas now Google, Kansas
I can’t decide just how dumb this is. In an attempt to make his town more internet friendly, Topeka mayor, in a formal proclamation, has unofficially renamed the town Google for the month. He should have renamed it Mustache, Kansas and he would have had all the men grow mustaches for the month and made millions for prostate and testicular cancer research. Believe it or not, this isn’t the first time the town has done this. Dumb anyway, but for the internet craze, way too late. Should have been done back when Google was only worth in the millions.
here is the full article
http://www.cnn.com/2010/TECH/03/02/google.kansas.topeka/index.html?hpt=C1
Dec
3
The Real “The Wire”
Baltimore’s current real-life mayor, Sheila Dixon, has been convicted of misdemeanor fraud. Don’t the bitch watch “The Wire”? Or is this a case of life imitating art? Well, “It’s alllll in the game,” I suppose…
From The Associated Press:
Mayor Sheila Dixon’s misdemeanor fraud conviction fails to meet a key standard necessary for her removal from office, her attorney said Wednesday as the mayor resumed her regular duties a day after the verdict.
Her criminal defense lawyer, Arnold M. Weiner, said the guilty verdict reflected testimony about actions that weren’t part of Dixon’s duties as City Council president, the post she held at the time.
State law requires removal of elected officials who are convicted of crimes related to their public duties and responsibilities.
A legal expert, however, said the argument that the conviction didn’t pertain to her public responsibilities would be weak.
It’s not clear if her defense team would have an opportunity to argue that point before a suspension took effect, or whether such a claim would be decided by the trial judge or another court.
Her defense team plans to appeal the conviction.
Meanwhile, former mayor and fellow Democrat Kurt L. Schmoke said Dixon owes her constituents an apology if she plans to fight for her job.
“The city has been put through a very traumatic situation. She should apologize for having placed the city in this situation and maybe ask the city for forgiveness,” said Schmoke, who served as Baltimore’s mayor from 1987 to 1999 and is now dean of Howard University’s law school in Washington.
Dixon’s conviction of fraudulent misappropriation by a fiduciary of $525 worth of gift cards carries a penalty ranging from unsupervised probation to five years in prison. Her sentencing hasn’t been scheduled. The jury acquitted her on three other counts, including felony theft, and failed to reach a verdict on a second count of misappropriation.
Under state law, Dixon must be suspended upon sentencing for a conviction that’s related to her public duties and responsibilities and involves moral turpitude. She would be removed permanently and replaced by the City Council president if she loses all appeals.
Byron L. Warnken, associate professor at the University of Baltimore School of Law, said Maryland case law has determined that fraudulent misappropriation is a crime of moral turpitude. He said any argument that Dixon’s conviction wasn’t related to her public duties would be weak, but a stronger case could made that she can’t be removed as mayor for an offense she committed before attaining that office.
“‘It’s a moot point because I’m finished being City Council president’ — I think that’s an argument,” said Warnken, an experienced appellate and criminal defense lawyer.
City Solicitor George A. Nilson, a Dixon appointee, said the first-term mayor would remain focused on citizens’ concerns and the city’s business until her appeals are exhausted.
Meanwhile, mayoral spokesman Scott Peterson said Dixon’s focus “is on the city and the citizens of the city.”
He said Dixon conducted a senior staff meeting Wednesday morning and had lunch with the city’s public schools chief.
Later in the afternoon, Dixon joked about the media attention at an event at a police precinct where a community group donated $5,000 to the department’s mounted unit.
“Well, it’s really great to be here and it’s great that you brought out all the media for this event. I’m impressed,” the mayor said, acknowledging the half-dozen television cameras before her.
Dixon said she wouldn’t comment as reporters shouted questions about whether she would step down.
Baltimore residents and downtown workers had varying views on Dixon’s future. Leon Hines, owner of a downtown lunch counter, said she should resign.
“Her own peers found her guilty; she’s responsible for her actions,” said Hines. He posted a lighthearted sign reading, “We don’t carry gift cards,” outside his store Wednesday.
However, Miranda Phipps, whose family firm, Phipps Construction Contractors, regularly vies for city contracts, said Dixon should stay on.
“We don’t want the mayor to step down,” Phipps said. “We want her to appeal.”
Nov
27
Well I, for one, am glad that this finally “came out…”
…I mean, now people might forget that Obama wasn’t born in America
Aug
25
Aug
23
The End of Ze World
This is a pretty funny take on the future of the nuclear weapon problem in the world.
Jul
29
Jul
10
11 Photos Where Black People Were Awkwardly Photoshopped In or Out
For some reason, black people and white people still don’t seem to like taking photographs together.
Which makes it awfully difficult when a magazine, newspaper or brochure wants to demonstrate diversity.
I dug around the Internet for the best pictures I could find where a black person was either blatantly Photoshopped in or out. Here are the 11 funniest and most absurd ones I found. (Huge, preemptive dap goes out to the brilliant blog Photoshop Disasters, who pointed me to almost half of these.)
1. Photoshopped diversity in Toronto. Our first entry is the most recent one… this comes from a summer fun guide that Toronto published last month. A spokesman said they “superimposed the African-Canadian person onto the family … [with] the goal to depict the diversity of Toronto.”
They made the change because of a new policy in Toronto where the city manager mandated the staff always try to represent the cultural mix of residents.
And, according to Kevin Sack, Toronto’s director of strategic communications, awkwardly plopping a miscellaneous black guy into a photo is sometimes an acceptable substitute for, ya know, actually having races mingle. Sack told reporters, “The policy doesn’t say Photoshop, the policy says ’show diversity’ … [but] when you’re publishing something with deadlines and you don’t have the right photo, the objective is to communicate the service.”
2. Curves cereal. If you’re an overweight black woman, listen up: Not only does Curves cereal help you lose your belly… it turns it white! (And belly button-less, like Kyle XY.)
Jul
9
Jun
25
Gov. Sanford : A Conservative Mind With A Liberal Penis
| The Daily Show With Jon Stewart | Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c | |||
| Governor Mark Sanford’s Affair | ||||
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| The Daily Show With Jon Stewart | Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c | |||
| Moment of Zen - Joe Scarborough Knows Mark Sanford | ||||
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Jun
23
Jun
9
The PEPSI Conspiracy
And they wonder why we think they’re fucking crazy. Also, if i’m not mistaken a penny is 1/100th of a dollar you fucking retard.
Jun
8
Swedish Pirate Party Wins a Seat in the European Union
The Swedish Pirate Party—Piratpartiet—has got a seat in the European Union parliament. The ballots are still being counted—almost done now—but with 7.1% of the votes, it’s a sure thing. Aaaaaaaarrrrr is all I can say. [Results]
Jun
4
May
21
Paying With Our Sins
This was taken from Reason.com:
The Obama administration’s drug czar made news recently by saying he wanted to end all loose talk about a “war on drugs.” “We’re not at war with people in this country,” said the czar, Gil Kerlikowske, who favors forcing people into treatment programs rather than jail cells.
Here’s a better idea—and one that will help the federal and state governments fill their coffers: Legalize drugs and then tax sales of them. And while we’re at it, welcome all forms of gambling (rather than just the few currently and arbitrarily allowed) and let prostitution go legit too. All of these vices, involving billions of dollars and consenting adults, already take place. They just take place beyond the taxman’s reach.
May
6
The Quiet Coup
I realize we make a lot of joke and pop culture posts, but I do believe we have a very sophisticated audience. This article was taken from the Atlantic Monthly. I’ve typed out the introduction and the rest of the article I scanned and attached as a PDF.
“The crash has laid bare many of the unpleasant truths about the United States. One of the most alarming, says a former chief economist of the International Monetary Fund, is that the finance industry has effectively captured the government - a state of affairs that more typically describes emerging markets, and is at the center of many emerging-market crises. If the IMF’s staff could speak more freely about the U.S., it would tell us what it tells all countries in this situation: recovery will fail unless we break the financial oligarchy that is blocking essential reform. And if we are to prevent a true depression, we’re running out of time.”
Apr
28
Fuck Fox
This was take from Crooks and Liars:
I was going to write that this didn’t surprise me, but it actually does because it’s not the FOX News channel.
The network is turning down the president’s request to show his prime-time news conference on Wednesday. The news conference marks Obama’s 100th day in office. Instead of the president, Fox viewers will see an episode of the Tim Roth drama “Lie to Me.”
It’s the first time a broadcast network has refused Obama’s request. This will be the third prime-time news conference in Obama’s presidency. ABC, CBS and NBC are airing it.
Fox Broadcasting Company issued a statement on their motives:
“The Fox Broadcasting Company will not air the Presidential News Conference,” Fox said in a statement. “Fox’s sister networks, Fox News Channel and the Fox Business Network, will air the press conference in its entirety. Fox will be alerting viewers with an onscreen graphic at the top of the 8:00 PM (ET) hour that the press conference is available on Fox News Channel and the Fox Business Network.”
If John McCain or George Bush were giving a prime time news conference, FOX would be giving it wall to wall coverage. Being the only network not to broadcast it kind of hits home the right wing bias that Rupert Murdock has brought to television. If Bill O’Reilly or Chris Wallace start whining about President Obama not appearing on their network they can only look at their own behavior, but this is much bigger than that. This is the president giving a speech to the nation at a critical time in our history and FOX just passed.
Apr
20
Iran’s President Ignites Walk-Out At Durbin Conference
Already boycotted by countries such as the United States, Australia, Canada, Italy, and the Netherlands due to concerns that it would single out Israel, the United Nation’s much criticized “anti-racism conference” started off with a bang today in Geneva.
From CNN:
“Dozens of international envoys walked out during a speech by Iran’s president as he accused Israel of having a ‘racist government’ and committing genocide. Mahmoud Ahmadinejad accused the West of making ‘an entire nation homeless under the pretext of Jewish suffering … in order to establish a totally racist government in occupied Palestine.’
Diplomats — mostly from Europe — collected their papers and briefcases and left the room. Cameras at the scene showed empty seats where delegates from France, Finland and Denmark had been sitting. The British and Spanish delegations also walked out.”
Hearing this type of anti-Israeli rhetoric out of Ahmadinejad is nothing new. What I find especially ironic is that the UN holds an “anti-racism conference” and allows one of the most racist and hate-inspiring national icons to speak unfettered. Bravo to the envoys who walked out on the bastard.
Check out the Huffington Post for more details.
Update: Now that I re-watch the video, you can noticeably hear cheering and Ahmadinejad saying “Thank you” during his anti-semitic rant. It’s startling to see how many supporters of his are present at the UN-sponsored anti-racism conference.
Apr
6
Blame it on the Gremlins…Blame it on the Henny
"Get a hooker Elliot Spitzer...do it!!!!!!!!"
From FOXNEWS.COM
Spitzer went on the “Today Show” on Monday morning in his first live televised interview since stepping down from the New York governship and blamed “gremlins” for the period in his life when he frequented high-priced call girls.
Steven Spielberg produced the hit “Gremlins” in 1984, a movie about mean little monsters who terrorized a little town.
Spitzer was apparently refering to personal demons that drove his hooker habit while he was governor of New York, with a wife and three daughters left unawares in the governor’s mansion
“There are no excuses,” he told interviewer Matt Lauer. “I have tried to address these gremlins and confront them. What I did was an egregious violation of trust to my family, to colleagues, to the state, and I paid a price and appropriately so.”
"80 dollars gets you an hour!!!!!"
"I hate Gremlins 2: The New Batch!!!!!"
Apr
1
Girls Just Wanna Have Fun
From The Huffington Post:
Washington lawyer Thomas Dunlap is under fire for attempting to sell a video of Ashley Biden, the 27-year-old daughter of Joe Biden, allegedly snorting lines of cocaine at a Delaware party last month.
The New York Post claims that Dunlap showed 90 seconds of the 43-minute tape, which purportedly shows Ashley doing lines of coke with a red straw in front of witnesses and later shouting “Shut the F– Up!” The newspaper reported that the seller wanted $2 million before dropping his price to $400,000.
"Dinner is Served"
Radar Online reported that Dunlap has since dropped the client after he learned the tape was recorded on a hidden camera, complaining about all the “negative attention.”
Dunlap told RadarOnline.com early Sunday that he is no longer involved in the attempted sale of the video and informed his client he would not continue to represent him. The lawyer said he did not want to be involved due to circumstances surrounding the publicity of the matter.
According to the New York Post, the video in question shows a woman who looks like Biden talking and snorting several lines of cocaine with a straw.
The video … shows a 20-something woman with light skin and long brown hair taking a red straw from her mouth, bending over a desk, inserting the straw into her nostril and snorting lines of white powder.
She then stands up and begins talking with other people in the room.
Vice President Joe Biden, who coined the term “drug czar” in 1982, has not yet commented on the story.
Jonathan Turley, a law professor at George Washington University, adds that fellow lawyers are stunned by Dunlop’s behavior:
While most people are shocked by the craven acts of the still unidentified friend, most lawyers are equally shocked by the involvement of a member of the bar in allegedly shopping this tape to tabloids for the highest bidder.
Biden is a social worker for a Delaware child-welfare agency.